Jesus frees retiree from decades of hidden pain

B had been a Christian for over 60 years but carried hidden pain and trauma that was never brought before the Lord, until an inner healing and deliverance prayer, where she experienced God’s healing and grace. Her heart has been opened to hear from the Holy Spirit and He communicates with her through her dreams and scripture. Praise God!

(简体中文 > 耶稣释放退休女子摆脱数十年的隐密痛苦 | 繁體中文 > 耶穌釋放退休女子擺脫數十年的隱密痛苦)

I was raised in a warm, close-knit Christian family of seven siblings in Kenya, guided by loving parents. 

We attended church regularly, shared fellowship at home, and were taught values that emphasized love, respect, discipline, hospitality, and service to others. My mother played a significant role in shaping our character. She spent time teaching us practical life skills, good hygiene, respect for one another, and compassion for the elderly.

Our parents ensured we had access to books beyond school requirements, including encyclopedias and other learning materials. Although I do not remember personally owning a Bible at that time, I know we had a Bible in our home. Church life was important and our family faithfully followed the process of baptism and church involvement. My father, who became very devoted and prayerful in the later years, kept a journal of his dreams. At mealtimes, he would ask us to leave the door open, reminding us that we might be entertaining angels.

As the years passed, we grew up, left home, got married, and relocated — some of us left the country for work. I continued attending church and raising my children in the faith.

I believed that baptism alone had addressed all spiritual matters.

I did not yet understand the importance of repentance and forgiveness, which leads to inner healing and spiritual freedom. Everything seemed in order.

Looking back, I now understand that sometimes we simply do not know what we do not know. Even when we read Scripture, we may miss vital truths. Hosea 4:6 (ESV) says, “My people are destroyed for lack of knowledge.” That verse later took on new meaning for me.

Although we live in different countries, my younger brother and his family became a strong spiritual example to us all. Their disciplined prayer life, commitment to intercession, and care for the wider family stood out. They are true prayer warriors. At one point, my brother mentioned that he was preparing for inner healing and deliverance prayers for himself. We held lengthy discussions trying to remember things pertaining to our family and I understood that this meant a lot for my brother. 

Although I assisted gladly by providing family information, I did not fully grasp the significance of deliverance.

We discussed prayers and spiritual matters from time to time. That planted seeds for what was to come for me personally. On one visit to my brother, he arranged for an inner healing and deliverance prayer session for me with the counsellor who had previously prayed for him. In that prayer session, God opened my heart and gave me a new beginning.  

The prayer counsellor had been praying for me for the days leading up to the prayer session and the Holy Spirit had given her questions to ask and points to pray about. Through that process, the Holy Spirit revealed long-buried wounds, lies, unresolved trauma, ancestral spirits that I hadn’t known about.

We began with renouncing the gods of the land from Kenya that our ancestors had worshipped and the generational curses that passed down to our family.

As I followed the renunciation prayers, I felt itchy and weak all over my body, coupled with some dizziness. For a moment, I could not even lift my leg. As the curses were broken and the ancestral spirits were cast out, the itchy sensation went away but I still felt weak. There was more deliverance needed.

Then the Holy Spirit gave the prayer counsellor a word of knowledge. She said, “There was a man who took advantage of you when you were little.” This brought back a memory of a long-buried trauma, when I was raped as a very young girl. I hated the man, and had abused and cursed him.

I never processed the deep pain and never told anyone, maybe because of shame or because it was easier not to say anything.

And of course, I never forgave him. The memory opened the old hurt and wounds afresh, and I cried a lot and felt even weaker. But the Lord wanted my heart to heal and be set free from this traumatic episode of my life.

The counsellor then tenderly led me into prayer of forgiveness, healing and restoration of my innocence. I prayed for childlike faith and asked God to turn my ashes to beauty. As we were praying, I felt the healing and I started to feel lighter.  

As we continued to pray, the Holy Spirit revealed to the counsellor the need to pray about abortion. Yes, I confessed that I have had a few abortions as an adult woman. The pain and trauma resurfaced and returned heavy, bringing unstoppable tears. This was even more painful and shameful as I had never processed any of it at all.

The counsellor lovingly led me, without judging me, through prayers of repentance and cleansing from all that in the wonderful name of Jesus.

I cut ungodly soul ties with the abortion clinic and everyone who encouraged me to do the abortions. I called out to God to heal my soul and forgive me. I also forgave myself and released myself from all the accusations that the enemy had been planting in my heart. I declared that Jesus’ blood is more powerful than the blood I had shed, and He had paid for my sins. Afterward, I felt very light and free!

I realized that I have carried unhealthy, unconfessed, unforgiveness, unwanted hurts/trauma baggage/burdens unconsciously for 59+ years. Though hidden, they continued to weigh me down, denying me freedom, and happiness to enjoy my walk and relationship with God.

I wept even more with the realization that, although I had served faithfully in church for many years, I had been serving God half baked — without fully surrendering and allowing Him to cleanse every area of my life.

The Holy Spirit continued to reveal areas that needed healing, confession, or release, including other cultural or generational burdens I had not recognized before.

The Holy Spirit gave the prayer counselor patience, kindness, and grace towards me. I experienced love and encouragement, not judgment. This helped me greatly in overcoming my pain. I found I could share my hurts freely and genuinely feel ready to forgive as we prayed. Though painful and challenging, the whole experience was profoundly freeing. 

With each prayer of forgiveness and repentance, I felt lighter and so much at peace, like a load was removed from my back.  I experienced God’s love, patience, and compassion in a way I had never known before. I felt as though a deep emptiness within me had finally been filled with His divine presence.

I prayed in the mighty name of Jesus for childlike faith and invited the Holy Spirit to cleanse my whole being—His temple.

I invited the Holy Spirit to fill me afresh and fill me with His divine presence. I asked for restoration in every area of my life: spiritual, health and wealth. Experiencing the Holy Spirit move so clearly assured me that the journey ahead would be amazing and blessed.

In the days and weeks that followed, the Holy Spirit answered my prayer and continued to guide me, revealing areas where forgiveness was still needed. He spoke to me through Scripture and dreams. Here are a few examples. The first night, I saw the words from Psalm 46, “Be Still” in a vision. The following day, I had severe pain in my hips and couldn’t sleep. Then I heard the voice of the Holy Spirit say, “castor oil” so I used castor oil on my hips. The pain went away and I slept well. I also dreamt of my brother, whom we had been praying for, he needed to forgive. I told him about the dream.  He took the step to forgive and reported that he felt better and lighter. In another dream, I remembered a girl in school who used to threaten me and demand money, so I would steal my mom’s money to give her until we confronted her with my mom. I prayed to forgive her and bless her. Hearing the Holy Spirit help and guide me this way is very new for me.

I still feel lighter, at peace, and spiritually awakened. I realize that I now appreciate sermons, they speak to me. I find I read the Bible more and more.

I know God is still working on me. I am learning to spend more time in His presence, to be still, and to listen. I am very grateful for my family, especially my brother and sister-in-law, for walking with me through many seasons of life. I praise the Lord for the counsellor’s ministry that God used so powerfully.

I feel renewed, joyful, and filled with hope. This is a new beginning, and I truly believe that the best is yet to come.