What does it mean to be a child of God?

Father God, Jesus, and the Holy Spirit have been in intimate communion* with one another for all eternity. It is an incredible privilege to be invited to be part of that communion through adoption to become God’s children. This is the Father’s love and desire for us – but what does it mean to be a child of God? No one’s family is perfect. Every parent falls short of God’s glory. What does communion with a perfect Heavenly Father look like? 

(简体中文 > 成为神的儿女意味着什么？ | 繁體中文 > 成為神的兒女意味著什麼？)

* Communion here refers to the sharing of intimate thoughts, feelings, or a deep spiritual connection.

Ephesians 1:3-5 NKJV  Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places in Christ, just as He chose us in Him before the foundation of the world, that we should be holy and without blame before Him in love, having predestined us to adoption as sons by Jesus Christ to Himself, according to the good pleasure of His will, 

Romans 3:23 NKJV  for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God,

The root word in Greek for “adoption” in the New Testament is “huiothesia”, which refers to the formal, legal position given to a person within a new family which entitles him or her to all the rights, privileges, and full inheritance of a legal heir. It is helpful to note that adoption does not require any effort on the part of the child. It is the adoptive parents who go through all the legal paperwork and preparation to receive the new child. That is precisely what Jesus came to do for us. He took care of all the legal rights by dying for our sins and paving the way for us to be reconciled with His Father.

Once adopted, however, a child is expected to take on his or her new family’s patterns and leave the original family’s behind. There is no looking back. This is in essence, what Jesus was referring to in Luke 14:26. A man or woman who is adopted as God’s child will no longer follow or resemble his or her earthly family. We are to turn so much from our own family’s patterns and identity that it appears to look like a form of rejection or hatred. This is because we will have begun living as spiritual people, led by the Spirit of God rather than mere human beings – no matter how close or dear they might be to us.

Luke 14:26 NKJV  “If anyone comes to Me and does not hate his father and mother, wife and children, brothers and sisters, yes, and his own life also, he cannot be My disciple.

The Holy Spirit qualifies who are truly children of God

Our adoption as God’s children involves the infilling and presence of the Holy Spirit. Genuine children of God are led by the Holy Spirit who comes to live in us. The Holy Spirit is the Spirit of adoption. Without Him present and leading us, we cannot truly say that we have been adopted as God’s children. He is the One who testifies if we are God’s children or not.

Romans 8:14-15  NKJV  For as many as are led by the Spirit of God, these are sons of God. For you did not receive the spirit of bondage again to fear, but you received the Spirit of adoption by whom we cry out, “Abba, Father.” 

Romans 8:16-17 NKJV  The Spirit Himself bears witness with our spirit that we are children of God, and if children, then heirs—heirs of God and joint heirs with Christ, if indeed we suffer with Him, that we may also be glorified together.

Jesus came as the Son of God to demonstrate what it means to walk as a child of God who is led by the Holy Spirit (Luke 4:1). It is this same Spirit, the Spirit of the Son, who will lead us into an intimate relationship with God the Father – just like how Jesus related so closely to His Father in heaven. For this reason, Jesus is called the first of many brethren. We are Jesus’ brethren. 

Galatians 4:4-6 NKJV  But when the fullness of the time had come, God sent forth His Son, born of a woman, born under the law, to redeem those who were under the law, that we might receive the adoption as sons. And because you are sons, God has sent forth the Spirit of His Son into your hearts, crying out, “Abba, Father!”

Romans 8:29-30 NKJV  For whom He foreknew, He also predestined to be conformed to the image of His Son, that He might be the firstborn among many brethren. Moreover whom He predestined, these He also called; whom He called, these He also justified; and whom He justified, these He also glorified.

Converted like little children 

Jesus makes a curious statement to all His disciples. He said that in order to inherit the kingdom of heaven, we have to convert and become like little children. This does not mean that we become childish. Rather, it means that we become innocent and pure in heart like little children, with no preconceived ideas or agendas.

Matthew 18:3 NKJV  Assuredly, I say to you, unless you are converted and become as little children, you will by no means enter the kingdom of heaven.

Children have many admirable qualities that we tend to suppress as adults. Namely, little ones are:

• Sincere, honest, with no underlying agenda
• Curious, inquisitive
• Resilient
• Quick to forgive
• Playful, imaginative, and see things through a lens of wonder
• Uninhibited in expressing their emotions freely, they cry when they are upset and laugh and giggle easily 
• Totally dependent on their parents for security, daily plans and provision

Can we see ourselves this way each time we go before God the Father? Let us take time to pause and reflect on the list above.

At the same time, we can observe that children tend to be impulsive and lack self control. They are only capable of viewing the world from their own perspectives. Because their brains are still developing, children lack wisdom and maturity, and tend to think and behave in self centred ways. Interestingly, these are the very qualities that the Holy Spirit will iron out in us. He is the one who will bear the fruit of “love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control” in us. It is also the Holy Spirit who will give us the mind of Christ.

Galatians 5:22-24 NKJV   But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control. Against such there is no law. And those who are Christ’s have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires.

1 Corinthians 2:12,16 NKJV  Now we have received, not the spirit of the world, but the Spirit who is from God, that we might know the things that have been freely given to us by God. For “who has known the mind of the Lord that he may instruct Him?” But we have the mind of Christ.

The Christian rebirth 

In Proverbs 22, we see that “foolishness is bound up in the heart of the child“. God’s Word reminds us that the “wisdom of this world is foolishness with God”. When we turn to God, we need to recognise that we need to become like children again. Many of us have not grown up rooted in the wisdom of the Lord. Now we have the Holy Spirit in us, He becomes the voice in our hearts to guide us to obey God’s will. Turning away from all the other voices and ideas that we have picked up along the way takes time and effort, because we have been taught that many things of this world that we have come to cherish are good for us (otherwise, we would not hold onto them).

Proverbs 22:15 NKJV  Foolishness is bound up in the heart of a child; The rod of correction will drive it far from him.

1 Corinthians 3:19 NKJV  For the wisdom of this world is foolishness with God. For it is written, “He catches the wise in their own craftiness”;

Becoming a child of God is not simply a matter of upgrading our “operating system”, but replacing it completely with a far superior “God-system”. For this to happen, we need to be “crucified with Christ” and live a new life by faith in Jesus. All our “old things have passed away” and we become new creations “through the washing of regeneration and renewing of the Holy Spirit”. 

Titus 3:4-7 NKJV  But when the kindness and the love of God our Savior toward man appeared, not by works of righteousness which we have done, but according to His mercy He saved us, through the washing of regeneration and renewing of the Holy Spirit, whom He poured out on us abundantly through Jesus Christ our Savior, that having been justified by His grace we should become heirs according to the hope of eternal life.

2 Corinthians 5:17 NKJV  Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new.

Paul confirmed this in Galatians 2:20 and 5:24, where he essentially said that he had died to himself completely (crucified) and that whoever is to become a child of God will crucify and die to all their passions and desires too. This can be a hard message to swallow. But we see that this is exactly what Jesus Himself has first done for us. 

Galatians 2:20 NKJV  I have been crucified with Christ; it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me; and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself for me.

Galatians 5:24 NKJV  And those who are Christ’s have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires.

1 John 3:16 shows that Jesus laid down his life for us. The root word of the word “life” here is “psuche”. It does not refer to one’s physical life, but to one’s soul (i.e. one’s emotions, mind, will). In other words, Jesus laid down the totality of Himself, including both conscious and unconscious thoughts, deepest beliefs, emotions, and behaviors, in favour of us, to save us. What an amazing God we serve! He certainly leads by example. By laying down His psuche, Jesus eventually laid down His physical life for us also. While we might not need to lay down our physical lives – though some of us may – we are all certainly called to lay down our psuche lives to follow Jesus. He is our Role Model. 

1 John 3:16 NKJV  By this we know love, because He laid down His life [psuché] for us. And we also ought to lay down our lives for the brethren.

John 5:19 NKJV Then Jesus answered and said to them, “Most assuredly, I say to you, the Son can do nothing of Himself, but what He sees the Father do; for whatever He does, the Son also does in like manner.

This is in essence, what baptism is all about. Baptism is not merely a ceremony for our friends and family to watch, it is an act of spiritual death and renewal. Just as the Holy Spirit resurrected Jesus from the grave, the same Spirit will give us newness of life as we arise from the “grave” of the water “burial”. (The act of Moses leading millions of Israelites through the Red Sea and coming out, delivered from their Egyptian enslavers, is a picture of this burial. See Romans 6 and Colossians 2.) This transformation happens when baptism is done with the right intent and purpose, by a fellow believer who is filled and anointed with the Holy Spirit – and not merely as a tradition. 

Romans 6:4 NKJV  Therefore we were buried with Him through baptism into death, that just as Christ was raised from the dead by the glory of the Father, even so we also should walk in newness of life.

John 3:5-6 NKJV  Jesus answered, ‘Most assuredly, I say to you, unless one is born of water and the Spirit, he cannot enter the kingdom of God. That which is born of the flesh is flesh, and that which is born of the Spirit is spirit.’

Our regeneration and renewal then continues as we obey God’s word and the counsel of His Spirit. Without all these, we will remain children of disobedience and not really children of God at all. When we continue to live according to our own fleshly desires, we are “by nature children of wrath, just as the others” in the world.

Ephesians 2:1-3 NKJV  And you He made alive, who were dead in trespasses and sins, in which you once walked according to the course of this world, according to the prince of the power of the air, the spirit who now works in the sons of disobedience, among whom also we all once conducted ourselves in the lusts of our flesh, fulfilling the desires of the flesh and of the mind, and were by nature children of wrath, just as the others.

Disciplined as God’s children 

This is why the Lord will discipline those He loves, so that we do not stay as or return to being “children of the devil”. The Word of God counsels us to fully embrace the Lord’s correction, and not despise or shun it. 

1 John 3:7-10 NKJV  Little children, let no one deceive you. He who practices righteousness is righteous, just as He is righteous. He who sins is of the devil, for the devil has sinned from the beginning. For this purpose the Son of God was manifested, that He might destroy the works of the devil. Whoever has been born of God does not sin, for His seed remains in him; and he cannot sin, because he has been born of God.  In this the children of God and the children of the devil are manifest: Whoever does not practice righteousness is not of God, nor is he who does not love his brother.

Proverbs 3:11-12 NKJV  My son, do not despise the chastening of the Lord, Nor detest His correction; For whom the Lord loves He corrects, Just as a father the son in whom he delights.

The Lord corrects those He loves for our own good. If He decides to stop correcting us – because we have rebelliously hardened our hearts and continuously turned a deaf ear to His soft and gentle promptings – it should be a matter of immediate concern! The Lord honours us with free will. If we keep choosing our own ways over His, He will honour our choice, even if it will lead to our demise. (No honourable father will keep on nagging his children.) If we find ourselves in such a situation, it is important that we repent and return to God the Father as soon as we can, because we have already broken fellowship with Him.

Romans 8:28 NKJV  And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose.

Hebrews 3:15 NKJV  while it is said: “Today, if you will hear His voice, Do not harden your hearts as in the rebellion.”

Thankfully, God the Father is a redeeming God, not a punishing one. He draws errant children back into His loving arms. The assurance of His perfect love for us casts out any fear of punishment. God’s discipline leads to holiness (i.e. being set apart for God’s divine purposes), not to torment, as we see from the parable of the prodigal son.

1 John 4:18 NKJV  There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear, because fear involves torment. But he who fears has not been made perfect in love.

Hebrews 12:8-10 NKJV  But if you are without chastening, of which all have become partakers, then you are illegitimate and not sons. Furthermore, we have had human fathers who corrected us, and we paid them respect. Shall we not much more readily be in subjection to the Father of spirits and live?  For they indeed for a few days chastened us as seemed best to them, but He for our profit, that we may be partakers of His holiness. 

Obedience is crucial for every believer. It is not only a demonstration of our love for the Lord, it also keeps us safe from evil spirits. Children of God will choose to stay away from sin and because of this, “the wicked one does not touch” them. Obeying God is not easy for any human being, because we are prone to choose our own ways, as a reflex. 

1 John 5:18 NKJV  We know that whoever is born of God does not sin; but he who has been born of God keeps himself, and the wicked one does not touch him.

This is especially true when it comes to “loving our enemies, blessing those who curse us, doing good to those who hate us, and praying for those who spitefully use us and persecute us!” The Bible shows us that this is a condition of being a child of God.

Matthew 5:44-45,48 NKJV  But I say to you, love your enemies, bless those who curse you, do good to those who hate you, and pray for those who spitefully use you and persecute you, that you may be sons of your Father in heaven; for He makes His sun rise on the evil and on the good, and sends rain on the just and on the unjust. Therefore you shall be perfect, just as your Father in heaven is perfect.

This is why Jesus sends the Holy Spirit into our hearts to be our Teacher, Counsellor, and Lord. He is the One who will convict our hearts and lead us to the righteous Way, Truth and Life, that is the Lord Jesus Himself. The root meaning of “righteousness“ in the Bible refers to being in a right relationship with God. The Holy Spirit is just a morals teacher, His intent is to keep us close to Jesus. Jesus is the embodiment of all righteousness and truth and it is through Jesus that we remain in fellowship with God the Father.

John 14:15-18 NKJV  “If you love Me, keep My commandments. And I will pray the Father, and He will give you another Helper, that He may abide with you forever— the Spirit of truth, whom the world cannot receive, because it neither sees Him nor knows Him; but you know Him, for He dwells with you and will be in you. I will not leave you orphans; I will come to you.

John 16:7-8 NKJV  Nevertheless I tell you the truth. It is to your advantage that I go away; for if I do not go away, the Helper will not come to you; but if I depart, I will send Him to you. And when He has come, He will convict the world of sin, and of righteousness, and of judgment:

John 14:6 NKJV  Jesus said to him, “I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through Me.

God’s children are to walk as children of light “in all goodness, righteousness, and truth”. If we remain children of disobedience, however, we will provoke the Lord to anger out of His deep grief at our obstinate rebellion.

Ephesians 5:6-10 NKJV  Let no one deceive you with empty words, for because of these things the wrath of God comes upon the sons of disobedience. Therefore do not be partakers with them. For you were once darkness, but now you are light in the Lord. Walk as children of light (for the fruit of the Spirit is in all goodness, righteousness, and truth), finding out what is acceptable to the Lord.

Obedience based on faith that comes from hearing God’s voice

The Lord God is a good Shepherd. As His sheep, we will hear His voice and follow Him. When we hear or discern the counsel of the Holy Spirit, it is as if Jesus is speaking to and teaching us Himself. We are all children of God “through faith in Christ Jesus”. 

John 10:27-28 NKJV  My sheep hear My voice, and I know them, and they follow Me. And I give them eternal life, and they shall never perish; neither shall anyone snatch them out of My hand.

Galatians 3:24-26 NKJV  Therefore the law was our tutor to bring us to Christ, that we might be justified by faith. But after faith has come, we are no longer under a tutor. For you are all sons of God through faith in Christ Jesus.

This is not an intellectual belief. Romans 10:17 shows us that faith comes from hearing and responding to the word of God. The Greek root of “word” of God here is “rhema”, which is the spoken word of God. In other words, we live by responding to the word God speaks in our hearts. This denotes a personal relationship with our Father, who speaks to us through the Spirit of His Son. This is one sign that we have left the bondage of the world behind and been fully adopted as children of the most high God – that we are “no longer slaves but children, and if children, then true heirs of God through Christ.” Praise God!

Romans 10:17 NKJV  So then faith comes by hearing, and hearing by the [rhema] word of God.

Galatians 4:3-7 NKJV  Even so we, when we were children, were in bondage under the elements of the world. But when the fullness of the time had come, God sent forth His Son, born of a woman, born under the law, to redeem those who were under the law, that we might receive the adoption as sons. And because you are sons, God has sent forth the Spirit of His Son into your hearts, crying out, “Abba, Father!” Therefore you are no longer a slave but a son, and if a son, then an heir of God through Christ.

May this sharing be a blessing to you as you seek to love the Lord with all your heart and rejoice in your adoption as God’s children.